


“Always find me, yeah?”

by aye_its_alaina



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Gen, Happy kids, I love my boys, dONT TOUCH ME, i started this right after it happened, i was emo, im sad and emo, just didn’t finish til now, slay kids, stray kids - Freeform, u gotta squint to see banglix
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-15 22:44:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13041048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aye_its_alaina/pseuds/aye_its_alaina
Summary: After Felix’s e*********n...





	“Always find me, yeah?”

On the way home to the dorms, for the second time in the past few months, the boys were eerily quiet. Excluding the occasional sobs from the young Australian boy. The other members were all struggling to hold back their own. None of the boys could look Felix in the eyes, ashamed that they couldn’t help their sunshine. 

For once, Changbin took initiative to cuddle Felix instead of the other way around, he didn’t care about his reputation anymore, all that mattered is for there to be as few regrets as possible for the younger boy. It was difficult to stay strong when he felt the usually-happy boy sobbing and shaking in his arms. In his best attempt to calm the younger and himself, he runs his hands through the black hair and kisses the crown of his head, which only causes the younger to burrow himself into the elder’s chest more than he already was. It was a heartbreaking sight really, especially seeing that Changbin seemed to be clutching onto Felix’s everything, especially considering that Changbin seemed to be sobbing just as hard as Felix. 

As soon as they stepped out of the van, Woojin and Jeongin stood by Felix’s sides, holding his hands for as long as possible, silently promising to always be by his side. The two boys tightened their hands on Felix’s as soon as he started shaking. Once they entire the dorm, the two boys leave to go to the kitchen, quickly working to make Felix’s favorite meal before he has to leave. 

Felix entered the room and wasn’t surprised to see the Seungmin was still crying, just as hard as earlier if not harder. Felix makes the move to pull out his luggage and he hears the slightly younger teen whimper out a few “no’s” and it hurts more when Seungmin clutches onto Felix, begging him not to leave. Begging that this was all a nightmare and that when he wakes up, he could laugh it off with Minho and Felix. Begging that Felix won’t leave him in a silent room. For once in his life, he doesn’t want Felix to be quiet. He would rather deal with constant mosquito noises forever than to have that eerie silence, as if Felix never even existed. 

Hyunjin walks into the room and lets out a shaky sigh, seeing that the two youngest 2000 liners were still crying. He himself only recently stopped crying, and he can’t help but resent himself for not helping Felix more with anything and everything. Maybe if he had helped Felix with his Korean like Minho had, Felix wouldn’t be leaving. The younger two slowly recollect themselves but that shatters as soon as Felix starts folding his clothes and putting them in that damned luggage. Seungmin says something along the lines of, “you’re not leaving, I won’t let you,” and Hyunjin shakes as he heads over to help Felix pack up his things and Seungmin only cries harder before clutching onto Felix’s back. It’s not that Hyunjin wants Felix to leave sooner, hell, he’d rather die than even think that. He doesn’t want Felix to reminisce too long on how he’s leaving the only place he called home when he moved to Korea. This was his dorm before anyone else moved in. Not only did JYP kick him out of the group, he’s forcing him into unknown territory. 

Walking into the kitchen after packing up all his stuff, Felix watches as Woojin and Jeongin move around the kitchen quietly, efficiently. It’s surreal, the dorm has never been this silent except for when Minho has left. When Jeongin turns around, he’s surprised to see that Felix was standing behind them, watching silently, almost as if he’s not really there. Instead of trying to initiate a conversation, Jeongin just leans in and rest his head on the Australian’s shoulder, still confused as to why JYP ignored all of Felix’s potential and decided to just kick him out. His mind turns and starts to oppose everything that JYP has ever critiqued Felix about, comparing his hyung to how even current idols have the same problem. He admires NCT, he really does, but Chenle could barely even speak korean before debuting. Felix had so much going for him but in an instant, everything that was going had halted. 

“Felix-ah, come here and taste this,” Woojin’s voice broke the silence. The two youngest in the room gradually broke apart, feeling as if they had been standing like that for centuries and it hurts Woojin and Jeongin to see that Felix’s eyes look cold and dead. The exact opposite of how they should be. Woojin almost breaks down, seeing that someone he views as a little brother looked as if he was about to crumble before his eyes. Woojin watches as Felix’s normally fluid and graceful moves now seemed robotic, exhausted mentally and physically and emotionally from all of these events. The Australian took a sip of the broth and a tear slipped out. All three boys were surprised. Felix didn’t think that he had the ability to cry more, Jeongin fussing over whether or not the broth was good enough for the elder, and Woojin purely because he thought that Felix would faint from further dehydration. Hurrying over to the fridge, Woojin grabs a bottle of water and opens it for Felix to drink. The young boy seems like a completely different person, no longer standing tall, curling in on himself, taking small sips of water at a time. Felix murmurs a small thank you to Woojin but it feels like he’s not directing it specifically at him. It feels more general and grateful when he gazes into Woojin’s and Jeongin’s eyes before he walks out of the kitchen. It was only then that Woojin let out his shaky sigh. It was only then that Woojin silently curses to himself, Felix has nothing to thank him for. It was only then that Woojin drowns himself in thoughts in self-resentment. 

Jisung nearly tackles Felix in an embrace the second that Felix exited the kitchen. Jisung, being the emotional boy he is, has similarity red-rimmed eyes and tear tracks down the sides of his face. Despite of this, Jisung forces a smile onto his own face, realizing that the dead atmosphere is making Felix much more sullen. The two same-age boys headed over to the living room, turning on whatever console they had and playing some COD or any and every game they had. Jisung let some jokes slip out and grinned whenever he heard a chuckle from Felix. But, after awhile, he felt Felix lean his head on his shoulder, and when Jisung turned to face him, Felix looked at him with a heartbreaking smile and said, “I’ll miss you, Jisung-hyung.” The barely younger’s voice cracked. 

“Yah, I’m not hyung! But, Jisungie will miss you too,” Jisung lets out a little chuckle at the end, begging for his tears to not fall, even when the Australian only cuddled up to his side. Even when he realized that this is potentially the last time that they could cuddle like this. 

Dinner was sullen to say the least, the boys all tried to keep a decent façade on their faces but it cracked the second that Felix said that they don’t have to act like they’re ok. Changbin was sitting next to Felix, but within seconds after Felix said that, he pulled the younger onto his lap and just hugged him for the rest of dinner and then some. Felix himself barely flinched, much too exhausted from that day’s events. The rest of the boys resumed quiet chatter, keeping Felix in the conversation as much as possible before their time ran out. 

The next major encounter was the middle of the night. No matter how tired Felix was, too many thoughts were swimming in his mind. He got up as quietly as possible, making sure that Seungmin wouldn’t wake up. The slightly younger had slept in the same bed, sad that Felix would have to leave him in a room by himself. Luckily, Seungmin only shifted and fell back into a peaceful sleep. 

As the currently black-haired boy wandered into the kitchen to retrieve some water or anything to make him physically tired, he didn’t expect to see anyone or anything else. Much less his former leader quietly weeping at the dinner table. Felix got two glasses of water and sat next to the elder Australian. The elder flinched when he heard the dull thud of the cup on the table. Completely turning around when he heard the chair next to his own slightly scraping on the floor. 

Felix silently leaned his head on Chan’s shoulder, relishing in the fact that the elder relaxed and gathered the younger into his arms. Allowing the younger to sit on his lap and just hug him. The two Australians sat at the table like that for a while; Felix in Chan’s arms and Chan laying his head on Felix’s. Felix disturbed the peace, “What’s going to happen now?” His English filled the silence. 

Chan moved themselves to the couch before answering, “I don’t know, but always find me. No matter what,” he took a shaky breath, “Promise me that you’ll always come to me for help. I refuse to leave you behind.” Chan pushed his forehead against Felix’s, their hair intermingled, their breaths mixed, their noses touched. Felix looked down and twined their pinkies together, allowing a small puff of air to escape. Chan smiled, barely, loving that Felix will never change himself, only improve his already excellent skills. The elder intertwined their hands and brought them up to his lips, bestowing a kiss on the back of Felix’s hand and fingers. Silently wishing that Stray Kids would debut as nine, silently promising to do his best to keep the boys together, silently mending Felix’s torn heart (even if it’s to a minuscule degree). 

The next day, when Felix left the dorm to move into the one where Minho was, the boys all sent him off, not with a farewell, but rather a “see you later!” When Minho welcomes him to the other dorm, Minho whispered something in his ear, something barely there... “We’ll see the others soon enough.”


End file.
